Having a son who was in the special education system for the entirety of his academic years, I’ve attended my share of IEP meetings.
My initial ones were a blur, I was a confused spectator more than a team member. I was familiar with IEP’s and how they worked, but I wasn’t well versed in reading them or setting goals. That would take some more education and learning until I no longer felt intimidated by my son’s IEP meeting. In looking through what I’ve learned through education and trail and error, I’ve narrowed down six strategies that helped me most.
Strategies for a successful IEP meeting
These are some strategies that have helped me go from a spectator to an valued member of the team.
- Have The Right Mindset – The correct mindset dictates the temperature of the meeting. If we believe school personnel are against us, then we are going in with a confrontational attitude. Everything they do will be seen as combative. We will be unreceptive to what they have to say or see the value of their input. On the other hand, if we view everyone as on the same team, all working together for the best interest of our child, we will have a more agreeable attitude. This in turn facilitates a positive meeting where both parties are open to hear what the other has to say.
- Leave Emotions in The Car – Anger and frustration don’t belong at the meeting. They are spoiled disruptive children vying for the spotlight. It’s natural to have these emotions but how we respond to them is our choice. Having the right mindset really helps keep those emotions at bay.
- Be Prepared – Take time to read the reports BEFORE the day of the IEP meeting. Write out any questions or concerns. Highlight parts you don’t understand or just need clarification on. At the same time, think about what the logical next step should be for your child.
- Don’t Go Alone – It has always helped me to have someone else attend the meeting with me. That person has always been my husband but that can be anyone who supports your child. Having an additional pair of eyes and ears ensures you don’t miss anything.
- Be Professional, Courteous and Polite – I’ve found people are more willing to help me if I am respectful. If I disagree with something, I will ask for clarification and try to understand their viewpoint first. And more often than not, this resolves the issue for me.
- Keep Educating Yourself – The more you know, the better advocate you will become. Most states offer free resources for parents to educate them on parental rights and IEP’s. Take advantage of them and learn.
This is by no means an exhaustive list but the six I felt helped me the most. If you are overwhelmed by putting them all into practice, I suggest start with one strategy at a time, particularly the first one. And if you have any strategies that worked for you, I would love to know.