How do we deal with the stress of living with the unknown? Because there will be times when we don’t know what’s causing our child’s struggles and instead of answers there will be more questions. How do we stay positive when we have to deal with this every day with no end in sight?
This was Megan’s experience. She was thankful Carson had a diagnosis. But there was still the constant frustration of not knowing the source of some of Carson’s struggles. Especially since there could be multiple causes, as mentioned previously here. Living with this kind of uncertainty every day gets hard, very quickly.
And after going through her dark days, Megan knows she can’t go back to that state of mind again. So she’s learning to be proactive by recognizing when she is struggling and addressing it right away.
Turning your mind to God
One of the most successful ways she’s done that is by shifting her focus from her circumstances and onto God. She talks about some of the ways she did that in this post. In addition, she also reminds herself of God’s faithfulness. Looking back at her life, Megan says she sees God’s hands even “in all the waiting and all the darkness.” She sees how God has been there with her every step of the journey providing her with what she needed at exactly the right time.
She’s also found a lot of comfort, hope, and peace reading the Bible and learning God’s Word. Megan’s amazed at how one book has the power to change her life.
Taking time for yourself
In addition to shifting her focus, Megan also takes time for herself. She does this in several different ways. Sometimes she has someone watch her kids while she gets out of the house. Lately, her favorite place to unwind has been Target.
Other times, she’ll put on a show for the kids while she reads a book or exercises. Just taking a moment to care for herself just as she looks after everyone else.
She’s confessed there have been times when she’s cried in the car because it’s just been one of those days. Megan says her car has been her faithful companion during many sorrows. That’s how important it is for her to make time for herself. Megan can’t stress enough how critical this step is for our well-being.
Finding your people
The third way she deals with her stress is by finding her people. These are people she can share her struggles with (other than her husband) and who are familiar with her situation. This could be a support group or reaching out to other moms who have the same diagnosis. But having someone to listen without judgment is so helpful.
Our reality
The reality of having a child with a disability (or without) means we will always be dealing with something. It could be unknowns, our child’s physical behaviors, insurance companies, schools, or just about anything else. Dealing with these issues on a daily basis can create a lot of stress and anxiety. So it’s important to have practices in place to relieve that stress before it gets worse and we find ourselves in a dark place.
For Megan, every time she feels herself slipping into frustration or anxiety she’s learning to shift her perspective to God. She’s teaching herself to pray bold prayers and to read the Bible. In addition, she tries to take time for herself by pursuing activities that relax her. Even if that means giving herself the freedom to cry. Or allowing other people to support and encourage her.
In the next post, she’ll share the one piece of advice she wished someone would’ve shared with her.