Conversations with Angela: This is the day

One of my favorite parts of the Conversations posts is always hearing the lessons God’s teaching other women. Sometimes what they’re learning validates what God’s teaching me. Other times, I learn something new to use in my own journey.

As is tradition, I asked Angela the same question I’ve asked every woman who has shared her story with me. If she could go back in time and share one piece of advice with her younger self, what would it be? As it turns out, the advice Angela shared is the same lesson I’m also learning.

She said she would tell her younger self to “[E]njoy what you have instead of trying to make it better. You don’t know what the future will be like, so enjoy where you are now.”

Enjoy the moment

I love this piece of advice and it isn’t because I’m learning it myself. Rather, I know how easy it is to get caught up in the doing or the tasks that we forget to enjoy the scarcity of life. A lot of times it’s subconsciously done. We’re so focused on the next step or checking off our to-do list we take life for granted.

Sometimes we assure ourselves we’ll stop to enjoy the moment when we aren’t so busy. Other times we get side tracked pursuing the good we don’t realize we’ve just passed up the greater good.

One thing is for sure, if we don’t regularly remind ourselves of the preciousness of life and make time to enjoy it, we will always take it for granted.

In Angela’s case, when Davis was a baby she had no idea his health would deteriorate as he got older. She didn’t know this was the best he would ever achieve. At that time in her life, she viewed it as the beginning of Davis’ accomplishments. She had no reason to believe otherwise.

Had she known this would not be the case, she would spend her time just holding Davis. Not rushing the minute by looking ahead to the next step.

Instead, she would savor the moment. Enjoying how perfectly content Davis was resting in her arms. She would delight in each smile and cherish every giggle. Thankful that all his problems could be solved with a hug and a cuddle and all his injuries could be healed with a kiss.

She would tell her younger self to enjoy this moment because it’s perfect. Life could never get any better than this. So slow down and savor it.

Davis’ belly laugh

Coincidentally, Byron also shared this same sentiment. He said when Davis was younger he had an infectious laugh that would come from deep within his soul and resonate through his entire body. Byron talks about how much he loved hearing Davis laugh and he reminisces about how he used to make Davis laugh by saying, ‘Are you ready to raiiiiissse a rumble!’ in his championship wrestling announcer voice.

He wishes he would’ve taken a moment to savor those days when Davis laughed because he doesn’t laugh anymore. Had he known Davis wouldn’t laugh like that again, Byron would’ve made him laugh all the time.

This is the day

Unfortunately, we don’t know the future. We don’t know how our circumstances will turn out. But while it is today, we can enjoy the moment. We don’t need to make it better nor does it have to be perfect for us to appreciate life.

In Psalm 118:24 the Bible puts it this way, “This is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.” We have this one life…this one moment. We have no idea what’s going to happen tomorrow. So let’s celebrate TODAY while we are living it. Always cherishing and savoring what we have rather than longing for what we don’t. And remembering to embrace each moment and living life with no regrets.

Life

Angela’s life certainly took an unexpected turn that day at Target and it has never turned back. There were a lot of adjustments she had to make. There were measuring sticks she needed to let go of and new ones she needed to pick up. But she has no regrets about her life.

She’s seen the faithfulness of God in every step of her journey, guiding and leading her. Angela doesn’t know why God choose her to have a son with a disability and she’s not sure if she’ll ever have that answer on this side of heaven. But Davis’ disability has allowed her to minister and reach out to people she would’ve never met before. It has also taught her to relish moments and never to take life for granted.

There are moments when Angela wonders about the quality of Davis’ life. It’s a valid thought to have. After all, Davis is dependent on others to meet his basic needs. There are very limited purposeful movements his body can make. He’s also non-verbal. Add to that his seizures and other medical issues. When Angela looks at Davis from her perspective, the quality of his life looks poor. However, this is when she relies on her faith.

Looking at life through God’s perspective

Angela’s learned to look at Davis’ life from God’s perspective. God’s got a purpose for Davis’ life. Just because he is non-verbal and doesn’t fit neatly into our preconceived ableist notions of a successful person doesn’t mean his life isn’t worthwhile or fulfilling. If we look at anyone’s life through our own lens, it will never measure up.

Thankfully, God’s perspective isn’t based on outward appearances (I Samuel 16:7) or our limited definitions of success. He always chooses the unlikely, invisible, and forgotten to be protagonists of His story (I Corinthians 1:27). The mistake in thinking is we need to see God’s purpose in order for there to be one.

The reality is, God ALWAYS has a purpose. He makes no mistakes and there are no accidents. But sometimes we are incapable of understanding because His ways and thoughts are much more advanced than ours (Isaiah 55:8-9). And in times when we don’t have the answers, we trust God does.

This is the truth that has helped Angela weather many storms.

It is her faith and trust in God that gives her the strength to get through difficult times. She’s learning to treasure each day and celebrate every victory. After all, today is the day the Lord has made and it’s meant to be enjoyed.